The Meanest Old Man in the World Hits 100

Charles Lane really isn't the meanest old man in the world, he just has played one numerous times in films and on TV.

You might remember him as Homer Bedloe, the mean old man who was always trying to shut down the Hooterville Cannonball on Petticoat Junction, but he's usually been some mean old man in whatever show or film he appeared in, an impressive list that includes, according to Mark Evanier, It's a Wonderful Life, 42nd Street, The Twentieth Century, Mr. Deeds Goes to Town, You Can't Take It With You, Mr. Smith Goes To Washington, The Big Store, Arsenic and Old Lace, The Music Man, State of the Union and It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, one of Evanier's faves, and one of mine, too (I used to live in the guest cottage on the estate where the Big W was located).

Later this month Lane will reach his 100th birthday, and Evanier is organizing a campaign to send him congratulatory emails. More info here.

Show "Random Selection" from ANYWHERE

BoingBoing has been doing a series of posts on unsecured web cams that can be accessed through a Google search.

An enterprising (is there any other kind?) blogger uses the Google API to put together a neat page that lets you easily see screen captures from various cameras from around the world. Click on an image to go to a (sometimes) live video feed.

The Robin Hood of Poker...

... is a gentleman named Barry Greenstein, a self-made millionaire turned poker pro at age 36, who donates the bulk of his poker winnings to charity - over $2 million in 2004. Greenstein has a new book (as what pro doesn't) coming out this year, which I suspect will be more interesting reading than the majority of poker books. As valuable as Super System is claimed to be (and I'm in the minority opinion that I don't think it's all that good), stylistically it's almost unreadable.

You too can be a venture capitalist

Tempting. If I had a $2k poker stake - which I don't - I might consider this investment. Pro poker player, Dutch Boyd, is auctioning 50% of any earnings he wins at the European Poker Tour Copenhagen event being played at the end of this month for a current stake price of $1,825.00. Boyd is also willing to wear a t-shirt/hat with your logo, and will ...commit a couple hours to helping the winning bidder with their own poker game."

On the other hand, if I could get Boyd to wear "www.fredbals.com" gear, I suppose I could take off the cost next year as an advertising expense. Hmmmm. (via Iggy at Guinness and Poker).

UPDATE: The auction was apparently removed and re-listed. I've fixed the link (There's currently one bid).
UPDATE YET AGAIN: The auction was ultimately removed by eBay. More info here.

Winter Wonderland

Not from Merrimack, but from Vancouver, B.C. via William Gibson...

Working with the dead

All the entries from the Best of Still Photojournalism site are worth viewing, but this stunning set of photos from the Riverside County Sheriff Coroner's office are like a mini film noir, each photo by itself could generate a complete novel. Warning, though, many of the images are very graphic and disturbing. Not workplace-safe and not for children. (via BoingBoing)

R.I.P. Will Eisner

I was never all that big a fan of his storytelling, but I loved his art, especially his "The Spirit" splash pages. Among many other things, Eisner is acknowledged as the creator of the graphic novel genre. Here's a detailed biography of Eisner's life and accomplishments.

More signposts from the future

Motorcycle daredevil Evel Knievel cannot sue a Web site that published a photo of him with two women above a caption reading "You're never too old to be a pimp," a U.S. appeals court ruled on Tuesday.

The term "pimp" was probably intended as a compliment, the court said.

In keeping with this line of reasoning, Knievel complimented the court by responding, "What good is law in the United States of America if five or six goddamn bimbos are going to rule against it?"

sigh. Some days you can't tell the internets from The Onion. Link

A 5,0000-year-old comic "book"

The article calls it "the world's first animation", but Scott is right, it may be the first comic book ever made. You'll need to have read "Understanding Comics" to see why.

Nota bene: Although it's slow, be sure to watch the video animation. Link at the end of the article.

More signposts from the future

Her name is Dylan, she's 11. She's the youngest video blogger in the world. She's famous.

"My sister said she felt like she was going to pee in her pants after she saw it."

Signposts from the Future Department

From BoingBoing...

Futurismic's publishing some amazing science fiction and this story doesn't disappoint. It's a great 10 minute read, perfect for the Web.

Can "it's a great 10-second read, perfect for the iPod" be far away?

Red Sonja & the Savior of Comics

In the early `70s, the comic book industry was on its last legs (the comic book industry tends to get wobbly legs on an average 10 year cycle. It’s going through another down period as I write this). Mark Evanier has an interesting article about Phil Seuling, probably one of the most influential people in the industry that you’ve never heard of, who near-single-handedly convinced the major publishers that the direct market would be far more efficient than the traditional news stand distribution.

Seuling was right, Marvel and DC eventually bought into the idea, and now most comic fans go to a specialty comic book store rather than the corner drug store (sorry, Jill).

The photo in the link shows Seuling on the set of the Mike Douglas show with Douglas, Jamie Farr, and Wendy Pini(!!) costumed as Red Sonja. If you’re a comics fan, you know Pini as the co-creator of Elfquest, one of the first independent comics. I tend to forget how many authors and artists started as fans – not that surprising when you think about it.

I had an “I’m getting old” moment while reading Evanier’s teaser to the full article, when he found it necessary to explain exactly who Mike Douglas was. Since M.A.S.H. is still in re-runs, I’m assuming Mark was just covering the bases when he also felt the need to explain who Jamie Farr was. I hope, at least.

Things to do in 2005

I don't believe in making resolutions, as my "resolve" usually falters quickly. Instead, I've come up with a list of things I'd like to do in the coming year... some that I'm fairly certain I'll get to, others more problematic. In no particular order:

Return to the Birmingham-Southern College Conference "Writing Today" conference in March and see my `Bama family again. Last year was a little wild as my friend Jill's mother was in the hospital undergoing cardiac bypass surgery (she's now fully recovered), but a Saturday barbecue at her sister Leigh's house still remains as one the highlights of 2004 for me.

Go soaring. Think I'll try the Greater Boston Soaring Club first when spring comes. If they're not around in Sterling anymore, maybe a day trip up to Franconia to check out the Franconia Soaring Association.

Entice Peggy to the top of Mt. Washington for the MAMA Minis-on-top rally.

Win a "big" Texas Hold `Em tourney. I'm still working on the definition of what I think qualifies as satisfactorily "big", but the PartyPoker.com Million tournament is definitely on that plane.

Related to the above, I've been playing No Limit Hold `Em for a little over a year now, mostly on-line, and just recently for money. I think I’ve improved my game over the year, mainly by moving away from the on-line free-roll* tournaments (which have as little in common with real Texas Hold `Em poker tournaments as an Ashlee Simpson performance does with a real concert) and focusing on cash Sit-n-Goes.* I’ve tripled my stake (although it’s been recently been beaten down by my losing attempts at the progressive jackpot at Party Poker – a subject that deserves a post to itself), finished in 8^th place in a 133-player money tournament (the October Poker bloggers tourney), and tried my hand at a live tourney.

In 2005 I want the same steady progression. I want to be comfortable with bigger buy-ins… and I want to make some money not just from poker but from writing about poker.

We’ll see if I have anything interesting to say.

*“free-roll”: A tournament that doesn’t require money to enter. Most on-line free-rolls will get you an entry into another, often money, tourney if you place high enough. On-line free-rolls are characterized by high number of entries – several thousand isn’t unusual – and loose, often extremely stupid, play, especially in the first hour. Part of this is due to the theory that the best way of winning a free-roll is to build a large a stack as possible in the first hour. Most of this is due to the fact that many people playing free-rolls are bored, looking for action, and don’t care whether they win or lose.

**“Sit-n’-Goes”: a.k.a. SNGs. SNGs are mini-tourneys of 9 or 10 (or more) people. The name comes from when a table is filled, play begins. I do better at SNGs than I do at any other type of table. I suspect this is because I tend to lose my focus after a couple of hours of play, especially when the cards aren’t coming.

Back

A new year deserves a new epigram. This one's from Jim Harrison's valuable memoir, "Off to the Side." More tomorrow.

Last thoughts on the "Queen of Sky" and Warholism

I think this will probably be my last entry on the "Queen of Sky" (who's self-proclaimed title I'm finally writing correctly), as I'm finding her and her "adventures" more pitiful than entertaining.

The QoS, with lawyer, was on a Today Show segment a few weeks back, during the period I was off blogging. Although she was obviously terrified, as opposed to her defiant print interviews and blog postings, she came across as a somewhat clueless young woman who just wanted her job back. She reiterated her claim that she had started her blog in reaction to the death of her mother, but then, when asked about the pictures that prompted her termination from Delta, responded that she had posted them in reaction to the death of her grandmother, leaving Matt Lauer, and presumably most of the audience, bemused and trying to figure out the connection. In explanation on her site, the QoS writes, "My blog is therapy to me, and the photos are part of that therapy... It been a stressful year (even more so now), and my blog lets me let off steam and have fun. "

The opportunity for more "fun" increases for QoS on a daily basis, unfortunately. Although I didn't note it for what I hope were obvious reasons, I googled QoS real name +Texas after she went public, and got back both her address and telephone on the first page of results. As anyone, except apparently Ms. Simonetti, could have anticipated, I wasn't the only one who thought of that, and her blog is now alternately filled with pleading and threatening entries about the phone calls she's receiving from various crazies. A fast review of her postings also reveals that she's being threatened with a defamation of character suit by another blogger and also is being accused of various unsavory things in her "Guestbook."

As I've said before, the `Net is a very nice place in the same way that the Amazon Basin is a very nice place. The fact that it may be beautiful and even entertaining doesn't mean that you can't get eaten alive. I suspect QoS is about 14 minutes and 55 seconds into her Warholian moment. I hope she survives it.

Early thoughts on the Dylan interview...

...mostly random notes, nothing cohesive at this point...

I mentioned to Peg while we were watching that Dylan looked very nervous, as he repeatedly twirled a pen between his fingers, but "nervous" is the wrong term. "Uncomfortable" better describes it, and "reactive." "Reactive" in the sense that I got the impression that most of the questions Bradley asked aren't questions that Dylan spends any time thinking about and he answered only because they were asked.

In the so-called "Rome Interview" conducted with a group of European journalists in July 2001, a very engaged Dylan spends a significant part of the interview talking about the "sound" he's trying to create -- a subject which you can tell the musician is very interested in. The same sense of engagement comes through loud and clear in Volume One of "Chronicles" when Dylan writes about the New Orleans sessions that produced, "Oh Mercy."

The dichotomy between the media/public-created "Dylan" and the musician who goes on stage every night and thinks about the music he's creating becomes more stark with each public statement, and I find I like and identify with the musician more and more.

Other things: It'll be interesting, and nice to see, if the complete out-takes from the reported 90 minute interview ever surface. I'm guessing it must have been a frustrating interview for Bradley and producers, as from a "sound bite" perspective, only Dylan's statement that he couldn't now write something like "It's Alright, Ma..." at the beginning and his closing remark about "holding up his end of the bargain" were the only two provocative segments. You can almost see the 60 Minutes teasers being born: "Big Bubba of Rebellion Sez He Doesn't Have Right Stuff Anymore!" and "Song and Dance Man Admits Bargain with `Chief Commander!'"

Fan Frustration: Trying to take the Nickel Tour

No, this doesn't have anything to do with the Freudian joke below. For well over a year I've periodically tried to purchase, "Disneyland the Nickel Tour", a massive collection of the complete set of postcards issued by the theme park, plus a history of Disneyland from opening to present day. To date I've been unsuccessful, though I just tried Amazon yet again.

If you follow the link to Amazon, you'll note that the book's availability is listed as "1 to 2 months", the first hint of weirdness. You'll also note that used editions of the book are going for several hundred dollars from various sellers, far above what I want to pay, while Amazon lists a new edition (from January, 2000) at half-price, $47.25 -- a price that I can justify paying for a book as yet unseen.

You'll also note that there's a review of the book from January 2004, which would be indicative, Watson, that the book is available. But, noooo. I tried buying "The Nickel Tour" again early this year, only to receive an auto-response from Amazon after a few weeks that they had been unable to contact the publisher and were canceling the order, which is also what I expect to happen this time around, too. I put a comment in the Amazon "review" section noting the book's unavailability... and the comment, which had to go through Amazon editorial review, was never published.

We pause for the Twilight Zone theme music.

Sometime in the summer, I got het up about "The Nickel Tour" once again after reading another glowing review and this time went to the effort of tracking down the publisher, "Camphor Tree." Go and check their site out, if you like. I'll wait.

Nice, if a little sparse, site, huh? If you click on "The Nickel Tour" link, you'll see you can purchase the book directly from them for $75, plus $7 s&h. Yikes! But what the hey, Fred's got the bit between his teeth at this point, and $82 is still better than $200 - 300. If worse gets to worse, I can always re-sell it on eBay, right?

Peg, if she's reading this, LoL at this point. :-)

If you're following along interactively with this saga, you can try purchasing "The Nickel Tour", or, for that matter, any book offered by Camphor Tree and this is what I bet you'll see, as the message hasn't changed in six months...

This supplier's CCNow store is currently unavailable. To our client: please log into your account and read an important message from CCNow.

I engage in idle speculation at this point and mention that I suspect that the "important message" is CCNow advising Camphor Tree that their account is long expired.

OOOOkay. What's left for Fred, who by this time had gone into his full rico-ga research mode and is determined to track down the Camphor boys (or girls, as the case may be). Well, there's an email address, and predictably, there's no response to the message I send in the summer. They're in Santa Clarita, CA, and a little research uncovers their snailmail address (predictably, a P.O. Box) and a phone number...

... which I call and reach an answering machine, or at least did when I tried this summer. And I leave a message. And (here comes that word again) predictably receive zero response. Zilch. Nothingness. The Big Nada.

That was this summer, and thus stymied (a word that always reminds me of one of the characters on "The Little Rascals"), I went on to other passions, which, as Peg can tell you, occur on the average of one a minute.

So, I'm blogging around this a.m. and go to the Disney Blog, where the author notes that this is one of his "favorite books", suggests it as a great gift idea, and even provides a link to Amazon. I go retrace the path I took in the summer, nothing has changed at Camphor Tree, but I click on the Amazon "buy" button, `cause what the heck, maybe the book is really now available, and go back to the Disney Blog and put a comment in the entry summarizing my tale of woe...

... and first I think it's been deleted ("Twilight Zone" music again) by the blogger, Mr. Frost, but what he's done is created a new entry with this remark at the same time I've been typing this entry...

Update: Looks like Amazon is out of stock on this item. I'll try to find out if there is a supply of these books out there anywhere. The untimely death of David Mumford, one half of the authorship and part owner of Camphor Tree Publishing, has made these books quite scarce. It might be a question of market demand. I think the minimum run for small presses is 10,000. They might just feel that's not warranted right now.

... and there we are. In the big scheme of things, the death of the co-author/publisher is a little more important, of course, and explains the unresponsiveness, and I'm sorry for the many Bad Things I've been thinking about Camphor Tree...

...but I sure wish I could find "The Nickel Tour."

Freudian Joke

that made me LoL, startling Bear this morning as he lay beside the laptop.

Courtesy of Scott McCloud, who notes on his blog that he first heard it on "Prairie Home Companion." I can't resist, btw. For $20, Scott, how do you spell the name of that game show again? :-)

My Neighbor's Wife

A noirish blend of poetry, graphics, and music that will haunt you for hours.

Ewwwww!

Your child's umbilical cord as a permanent memory. Call me old-fashioned, but baby shoes are good enough for me. (via BoingBoing)