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And Daily Deer

And, continuing the Double-D theme of the day, here's a pic of "Daily Deer," so named because of his habit of showing up almost every day and grazing on fallen bird seeds, as well as our yews, which I wish he wouldn't.

But, I have a soft spot for DD, because he's got a bum hind leg. We first thought he had dislocated it, or had been hit by a car, but have now concluded it's a birth defect. He gets along quite well on three, thank you very much, even through the snow.

On the other hand, he looks like he's expending a lot of energy doing with three legs what other deers do with four, so I put out a feed block for him (you can see it behind DD), and he seems to be enjoying chawing on that. After consulting with our vet, I've now also expanded the DD menu to apples, carrots, and a hay bale and Peggy has taken to calling me "Farmer John."

DD may have put out the word that I'm a soft touch, as a few days ago, a posse of four new deers, including a Fall fawn, showed up behind him. Although DD is too slow-moving to keep up with them, they all seemed used to hanging out together, and I suspect they all share some bedding place in the woods behind us.

I dithered about "nature taking its course" and all that, but again, after a frank discussion with our vet, who I trust, we figured that as long as DD nether looked like he was suffering or starving I'd at least give him a fighting chance. As the vet said, if he can make it through the Winter, the chances are he'll do fine come Spring. Interestingly, she says deers with only three good legs are quite usual, and many of them live a deer's normal allotted time.

And, I have this nagging thought that DD is a sign to an often-morose Farmer John that " you have to farm in the weather you are given, you can't be waiting for the sun to shine."

Live long and prosper, DD.

There is No Need to Adjust Your Monitor

I'm frigging around, yes again, with moving fhb into the modern world and the "new" Blogger. This time things seem to be going slightly easier. But expect this page to rearrange itself over the next several days until I get it whipped into shape.

36 Years Ago - Chadwick School

While doing some spring cleaning, Peggy came across my old yearbook from Chadwick School. We had thought it lost or destroyed in one of our periodic basement floods. Instead, it had been safely packed away in a box that had remained unopened since our move from the condo to this house, what 11, 12 years ago now?

Pictured to your left is the group photo of the staff of Chadwick School's 1971 yearbook, The Dolphin, all looking very young. As I remember, the semi-pro photographer, who later quit midway through the job, was very big on "natural" poses. Thus, this and many other group photographs where some people are posing and other people look as if they've wandered into the shot by accident. Our Yearbook Adviser was not pleased and after several clashes with the photog - himself a recent Chadwick grad, the remaining work was farmed out to two Chadwick students; a junior and sophomore as I remember who did, in fact, a much better job.

I may eventually post my individual class picture, although Peggy says I look geeky... And indeed I do. I don't remember anymore, but from the photo it looks like I was at the start of growing what would turn into the Fu Manchu 'stache I wore until going into the Army and had recently had an amateur haircut from one of the girls I was dating, probably at the demand of either the school or my Dad. Two of those girls are in the picture. But I won't tell you which two.

My Tag Says "Wash in Cold Water"

I hadn't even realized that the "Tag - Seven things About Me - Tag Seven Other People" meme was an internet thing, probably going to show how little I social network either in real life or virtually. I had judiciously avoided the game on gather - where I thought it had originated - even after being tagged by the ghost of Jimi Hendrix, or so he claimed. Anyway, like nearly everything on gather, a semi-huge battle broke out about the Tag Game among various factions for and again' it and, like nearly everything on gather, it was easier to avoid the whole thing by ignoring it... so I did.

But, I've been tagged by a friend, and that makes it a horse of a different color, as the doorman to the Emerald City says. But I got a couple of problems. Uno: I'm not sure I can come up with seven new things. Hell, I mean that's what fhb is all about, and after 3+ years, there's not many new stories left that you O Constant Reader haven't already read - or in Peggy's case, heard. But I'll try. Dos: As I said, I'm not all that much of a social butterfly, I don't think I even know seven people who would understand what this is all about, let alone those who have blogs to continue it. So, I'm afraid that part of the tag game will remain unfulfilled here.

But in the spirit if not the letter, seven (or maybe less) things you probably didn't know about me unless you're Peggy.

1. I'm a 1 1/2-finger typist. Back in the day that they offered typing classes in my middle/high schools, it was considered a "girl's trade," like "homemaking" and not offered to us virile young men-types, who were supposed to take such useful classes as "Shop." I never learned how to formally type, ironic given my trade, doubly ironic since I spent the final days of my Army career as a "clerk-typist." I type with the middle finger of my right hand and use the index finger of my left to press the "Shift" key. The one time in college I tried to learn formal QWERTY typing, I became like the proverbial centipede who was asked how he kept all those legs in order... and never walked again. But, unless you're a professional typist, I'd lay odds I still type faster than you.
   
   
2. I learned how to fly when I was 13 years old. My Dad taught me in a Cessna 180 seaplane on Long Lake in Maine during one long-ago endless summer. We had to put a pad on the seat and blocks on the rudder pedals. I never bothered to get a license because my father had let his instructor's license expire and I would have had to go through all the formal crap and why bother. While I've done both in a seaplane, to this day I've neither taken off or landed a plane on land.
   
   
3. When I was young I was regularly mistaken for Cat Stevens. Now I'm regularly mistaken for George Lucas. Make of that what you will. And I mean mistaken, not "Hey, you look like..." I've had people get angry at me because I wouldn't sign an autograph. In one case, I did. That autograph probably now goes for a few hundred dollars.
   
   
4. My draft number was 79 in 19 and 71. They drafted up to 125 that year. For those of you who don't know what that means, go here.
   
   
5. The first time I ever got drunk was on a vile concoction called raisin jack, which my boarding school roommate and I brewed up after I discovered the recipe in a book about prison. One batch blew up in my closet, forcing me to launder all the reeking clothes. The hangovers would last for days.
   
   
6. My nose was examined by Tom Jones' doctor. So, I'm reaching, what the hell. But it was. Jones had flown the doc up to Maine to treat him for a sore throat. I was in the room next door being examined for a constant nose bleed. The Doc was the leading nose/throat man on the East Coast, and came over to express his opinion. Tom himself later stopped in to shake my hand, not an easy task leaning far back in an examination chair and covered in blood as I was.
   
   
7. The first story I ever wrote was titled "Screwy the Screwed-Up Screwdriver." I'm not sure how old I was, but young enough to bemuse my teacher with it. It's somewhat frightening to me that I can still remember not only the title but whole sentences from something written around 45 years ago, but can't remember whether the cat is in or out five minutes after I've seen him.

So there you go, Miss K/M. Realize I wouldn't have done this for just anyone.

Get a Uclue

While Constant Readers know that I was no fan of the now defunct Google Answers (contract researchers - of which I was one for a time - would attempt to answer customer questions for payment), I was a fan of many of the researchers. In fact, I was a fan of nearly everything at GA except the brain-damaged administration of the site... but no need to get into that rant again.

Now, many of the GA researchers are back at a new site called uclue.com, an attempt to do GA right. With the absence of the contradictory combination of Google interference and benign neglect, I suspect that uclue may have a shot. The early signs look good. For example, GA refused to allow researchers to provide answers in other than English (I suspect because the overseers only had one language), even though a high percentage of GA customers were from other than English-speaking countries. uclue can field questions in three languages, English, German and Spanish, and may add more down the road.

At last count, 29 of the former GARs have signed up as researchers on uclue, including many of the most well-known in the GA community, such as pinkfreud. In theory, I'd be eligible to join up as a researcher, too, but have no plans to at this point, with way too many other paying gigs on my plate. But best of luck to all my old colleagues!

Fred on Gather

I have so many cross-promotions going, it's getting hard to keep track of them all. :-)

But for those of you who have asked, here's the link to my Gather page, where you can keep up on my weekly column, Music You Never Forget, as well as other postings. If you're a die hard Fred fan, you can even join Gather and click on that little "Connect" button you'll find in the left column, and then get email updates whenever I post something "new."

"New" is in quotes because at least one reader expressed disappointment that I've been reworking several articles that originally appeared either in fhb or Dreamtime. And, that's true, but considering the size of my audience in both blogs, I figure I can get away with pushing re-runs out to a larger readership. Constant Readers - that would be you, O husband of Joyride - will be happy to know that yesterday's column, Somebody Say a Prayer, is brand-spanking new, although I just cross-posted a version to Dreamtime.

Between Dreamtime and Gather, I'm now writing the equivalent of two weekly columns, as well as regular posts on fhb, and let us say, only getting fully reimbursed in the spiritual sense for my efforts. But, by God, I'm having fun, and who can ask for more?

That Big Announcement Time

Thanks to Dreamtime I've signed a deal and will be writing a weekly music column for "Gather," a social networking site, that's sometimes been described as "the MySpace for the NPR set." You can see the site here...

http://www.gather.com/

... and you can track my writing at Gather here.

The column's name is currently "Under the Radar," although that will be changing to avoid confusion with a music mag of the same name.

Whatever I end up naming the column, it will have the same general theme as Dreamtime; stuff you wouldn't hear on the radio; trivia, stories about music and musicians. Sometimes the content will be the same thing as I'm posting over at the Dreamtime blog - edited to make sense for non-Theme Time listeners - sometimes it will diverge. I have a couple of things in mind that wouldn't fit in Dreamtime that I've been hankering to write.

Gather has been around for about a year. It's Boston-based, partially funded by NPR, the Hearst Corporation, several others. It don't think it's been as successful as anyone would like.

When I joined last year Gather reminded me of an out-of-control writing workshop, with everyone clamoring for attention for their own writing and no one willing to read anything else. Most people who I sent to Gather found the interface very confusing, too, as I did. I cross-posted a few articles from fhb and Dreamtime at Gather with little reaction over the past year, and eventually decided it was too much of a hassle for the 'lil Gather dollars that the articles earned.

But I think they're making a good move, I'm one of what will eventually be 70-80 "Gather Correspondents," for various groups such as politics; music; writing; movies; cooking; and so on - and whose agenda - outside of writing - will be to put some order and consistency around the chaos.

Gather has changed their user interface too. It now seems to be simpler and easier to find things you're interested in reading. But we'll see how it works out. The gig doesn't pay much - few freelance writing gigs do - but it does pay real moola now as opposed to their "Gather dollars", and the exposure may be good, especially since I can cross-advertise Dreamtime, fhb, and my Amazon Dreamtime store. And heck, I even get free CDs.

And that's the Big Announcement. I was touched that several family members and friends contacted me in the hopes that XM, or NPR, or Mr. D., or somebody was tossing bags of gold my way. But Dreamtime is the best sort of writing. No pressure, no censors, no editors. Of course no money and a small audience too. :-) But I still find it fun, and at this point, having fun writing is a very important thing to me. I'm hoping the Gather gig will be fun too, but whatever happens, you'll hear about it. Promise.

We now return you to the regular blog, already in progress.

Time to air out the ol' ape pelt tomorrow

Well, indeed. And why is it important, you ask? Read all about it here. You'll be proud of yourself for helping promote such a worthy cause.

Oh, and for those Constant Readers emailing me about the Big Announcement (and one so curious he even had his wife call), I'm under embargo until February 1st and - since I'm travelling that day - I probably won't make the Big Announcement until the 2nd.

So hang in there.

Dreamtime, Nancy Sinatra, Theme Time Videos and Big Announcement pending.

Did you know that Phil Silvers - Sgt. Bilko - wrote the lyrics to Nancy with the Laughing Face? I didn't until Bob Dylan informed me, and that's one of the reasons I love Theme Time Radio Hour. Read all about it here.

I'm also adding a new segment to Dreamtime that I plan on offering on an "off-week" (that is, when I don't have the next podcast in the works) basis... always keeping in mind that consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds and sometimes I'll be posting a podcast that week, sometimes a YouTube video, maybe sometimes I'll post both.

One of the things I miss from the closed White Man Stew Theme Time Forums was someone posting "Theme Time" artist videos found on YouTube. Here's one of my favorites, from 1989 Van Morrison reading the Slim Gaillard passage from "On the Road," as Gaillard himself recreates the scene as described by Kerouac. Dylan read the same passage in the "Moon" episode of Theme Time.

And finally, in the spirit of Big Announcements, I hope to have a Big Announcement made public Real Soon Now. And no, neither Dylan nor XM has offered me a job. It's not that Big.

Bert Lahr Cowardly Lion costume from The Wizard of Oz on eBay

Closed at $700,000 on December 14th to a Johnny Dann :-) Well, maybe not that last. However, Johhny D. was at that auction in 1970 mentioned below.

In the interests of posterity- since I don't know how long it will stay up - here's the listing info:

130. The Original "Cowardly Lion" costume worn by Bert Lahr in The Wizard of Oz. (MGM, 1939) After an absence of nearly 60 years, the "Cowardly Lion" triumphantly returns to center stage! Yes, this is the ACTUAL costume worn by Lahr in the revolutionary 1939 fantasy classic, "The Wizard of Oz". This film was notable not only for its amazing story, which virtually transported the audience from their chairs to the wonderful Land of Oz - but did so by using the most exciting and imaginative sets AND breathtaking costumes that moviegoers had ever seen! The art of filmmaking was forever changed.

The history of the "Cowardly Lion" costume since the completion of filming is interesting, if not miraculous. Presumed lost after the last frame was shot, it was literally discovered at the 11th hour before the 1970 MGM/David Weisz Auction, the most famous and legendary sale in the history of Hollywood memorabilia. The costume had been bagged and tucked away in Mrs. Culvers barn in Culver City, California, and was stumbled upon by some Wiesz staff members whod been looking through the barn for a few last items. The costume had literally been forgotten for the previous 39 years!

Understanding the magnitude of this discovery, Weisz had an addendum to the auction catalog printed that very afternoon, which was passed out to the bidders who turned out on auction day. Thus, there were no advance announcements or publicity for the costume.

A California chiropractor who happened to be at the auction bid on and won this magnificent costume for the bargain price of $2400. Without the cash on hand to pay for it in full, he put down a $1000 cash deposit to hold his purchase, and returned approximately one week later to pay the balance and take possession of his prize. A perfect case of being in the right place at the right time!

Since 1970, the costume has changed hands only once - purchased by the current owner, world-renowned artist Bill Mack, in 1985. However, the costume sat quietly until 1996, when Mack set about having it preserved and displayed in all its original glory. As the costume is constructed of real lion pelts, some minor deterioration had occurred over its 50-year life span. Mack took the costume to a well-known Midwest taxidermist who painstakingly restored the costume, added a lining, and mounted the costume on a flexible steel armature. Mack then skillfully recreated the headpiece with a lifelike sculpture of Lahr in character in all its glory

Thus, the costume has arisen from the clutches of time, so to speak, to re-emerge as a fantastic and gorgeous relic from the past - a touchstone to one of the greatest films in the history of the art.

This beautiful costume is composed of real lion pelts, which have been sewn together to form the complete outfit. The costume is positioned in the memorable "Put em up, put em up" pose from the film, and is mounted on a wood pedestal with a Yellow Brick Road diorama and poppyfield border. Designed to accommodate interchangeable tails, the costume comes with the one supported by wire apparatus. Complete documentation accompanies this piece, including the David Weisz Co./MGM auction catalog and addenda (showing the costume as lot #950A); the original auction tag with cash receipt for the first $1000 payment (made the day of the auction); 1970 bidders paddle; and detailed ledger pages of the items in which the buyer was interested, at the head of which is noted the Cowardly Lions costume.

One of the most coveted pieces of Hollywood history extant, it stands alone as the sole "Wizard of Oz" costume that remains available to collectors in the public domain: the "Tin Man" was largely destroyed (only pieces remain), and the "Scarecrow" is currently housed in the Smithsonian. Considered the "Holy Grail" of all Hollywood memorabilia, this costume is worthy of inclusion in the very finest collections of film artifacts!

Judy Garlands blue and white gingham pinafore, of which at least ten were made for the film, and at least six survive in private hands, sold at auction in England in 2005 for $285,000.00, and another sold at auction in England in 1999 for $324,000.00. $400,000 - $600,000

You say it's your birthday?

Well, it's my birthday, too, yeah!

2006 Roundup

I don't really believe in "best of," maybe more like "pretty good of" lists. Here's stuff I read/heard/saw/did/liked during 2006... and maybe you will too.

Book (Fiction): Pound for Pound - F.X. O'Toole.

I was a little leery of this novel, since it was edited from O'Toole's incomplete manuscript. And indeed, it's an uneven book, with characters disappearing and sketchy scenes begging to be fully fleshed out (and instead, told after the fact). But even so, it's a worthy successor to Rope Burns/Million Dollar Baby, and a fitting capstone to Jerry Boyd's much-too-short writing career. If you like boxing, boxing books, or the movie Million Dollar Baby, go find this book, which, like Rope Burns before the movie, already seems to have disappeared without garnering much fanfare.

Book (Nonfiction): The Great Deluge: Hurricane Katrina, New Orleans, and the Mississippi Gulf Coast - Douglas Brinkley.

A lot of books came out in 2006 about Katrina. This is one of the best, in my opinion, with a clear time line of the storm and its aftermath,and the stories of both the heroes and villains... of which President Bush and his incompetent team of political appointees are the major ones.

Book (Graphic Novel) : Lost Girls - Alan Moore, Melinda Gebbie.

A beautifully-package three-volume set. Certainly won't be to everyone's taste - and very probably will deeply offend some. Alice of Alice in Wonderland, Dorothy of Wizard of Oz, and Wendy of Peter Pan reimagined by one of comicdom's master storytellers as Victorian erotica. Amazon, btw, has this for 40 percent of its list of $75, and I would assume you can pick it up elsewhere for the same, or even less. Worth the full price, it's a bargain at $47.25.

Book (Graphic Novel): The 9/11 Report: A Graphic Adaptation - Sid Jacobson, Ernie Colon

The most accessible version of the 9/11 report available. I was able to get through the original 800-page report, but it was tough slogging at points. This version is painstakingly faithful to to the original, does not over dramatize the events, and provides a valuable visual time line on when things happened. Highly recommended.

Radio: Theme Time Radio Hour (with your host, Bob Dylan). Available through XM Radio, AOL Radio, and various other venues.

I'm writing an article with the working title of, How Bob Dylan Helped Me Fall in Love with Radio (Again) and... he did. One hour of dreams, themes, and schemes, a playlist that encompasses everything from I Heard the Voice of the Pork Chop to Jailbait (Peggy's favorite TTRH song to date), plus commentary and def poetry readings from Mr. D.

Radio the way it was, or maybe the way it should have been.

Online Poker site: PokerStars

I throw this one in only because of the "Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act," which, in fact may or not have an impact on playing online poker. Two members of Congress, in response to my mail, stated flatly that the UIGEA did not make the playing of online poker illegal. Of course, both of them conveniently overlooked the fact that the bill will - or may - make money transfers in/out of poker sites near-impossible, but who knows? We'll have to wait and see what happens.

In any case, while some poker sites - PartyPoker the most notorious - decided to cut off their relations with U.S. players and run for the hills, PokerStars (and some others) stepped up to the plate and said, "we're here to stay and the status is quo." So far, that's been so.

I've been with PokerStars almost since I started playing online lo' two years ago now. It's a good site, good graphics, minimum connection problems, relatively good and polite players (given that I play at the very low money levels).

If you were looking for a site to try online poker and asked me, my first recommendation would be Stars.

Podcast (non-commercial): Coverville

It's been kind of a bad year for the podcasts I like to listen to, "Card Club" closed its doors, unfortunately ending with a very poor final show. Columbo migrated his "One Minute Mysteries" over to another poker podcast which I find unlistenable on the whole. PokerDiagram is still around, but has gotten very erratic both with releases and sound quality. "This Week in Tech" seems to be suffering from burnout, with wildly inconsistent shows week-to-week. I still like "Five Hundy by Midnight," but there's only so much Vegas news you can take unless you're planning a trip to Vegas.

One of the few podcasts that I was listening to regularly last year that I'm still listening to regularly this year is Coverville. As the name says, host Brian Ibbott plays cover versions of popular songs, sometimes a hodge-podge, sometimes with a theme based around a particular artist. Or even album. One of my favorite Covervilles was a track-by-track cover of Dark Side of the Moon.

I've bought several pieces of music from iTunes after hearing them first on Coverville, and in fact played an artist's music on Dreamtime after hearing him on Coverville. Higher praise I can't think of giving to a DJ and his show.

If you still don't get podcasting, see if Coverville doesn't change your mind.

Podcasts (Commercial): This American Life and Wait Wait, Don't Tell Me

Well, "commercial" in the sense that they started life as NPR shows. NPR gets podcasts, happily. I used to listen to "This American Life" back in the days that Peggy and I were commuting to her parents every other weekend, and would try to catch WWDTM while I was out running my chores on Saturday. Now, I listen to them when I want. And that's what podcasting is all about folks.

I assume you know of both shows already. If not, WWDTM is a "weekly news quiz" show and one of the most consistently funny shows you'll hear. TAL is basically just like Car Talk. Except just one guy hosting. And no cars. No, I'm kidding. You can learn more about it here.

If the Car Talk boys and Prairie Home Companion weren't such greedy bustards, my NPR => podcast life would be complete.

Online news - PopURLs

I'm not doing a blog category as I'm suffering from blog-reading burnout. I still visit a few regularly, but with nothing near the consistency of even a few months ago. Partially that's because some blogs have changed - Scott McCloud is on a year-long family trip cum book tour, for example, and Mark Evanier has gotten more into posting YouTube videos than commentary - and in some cases I think I've just overdosed on the blogger's personality.

One agggregator site I like a lot and still tread every day is PopUrls - links, as they say to "the latest web buzz." One major plus of PopUrls is it spares me of even accidentally reading anything posted by Cory Doctorow - who is one of the few writers I've ever run across who can set my teeth on edge with almost every word he writes - while still having access to BoingBoing news.

CD - Modern Times

Kind of a mulligan, I know, but I don't buy all that much music. If you're not a fan of Dylan's, this probably isn't going to make you one. I wasn't even sure how much I liked it after a few listens. But, just like with 'Love and Theft,' I'll find myself humming something, and then realize it's Nettie Moore or Spirit on the Water.

Music that sticks.

CD - Modern Times Live - The Roots and Wounded Flowers

This is something you'll either know how to find without me telling you more... or you won't. A fan dream 3-CD compilation of music that can be traced as sources of Modern Times, interspersed with cuts from Dylan's latest U.S. tour. Johnny B. Goode; Roll and Tumble Blues Hambone; Beyond The Blue Horizon; Hellhound On My Trail; and Highway Of Regret are just some of the cuts.

The sort of labor of love that seldom makes it to commercial release.

Road Trip - Lopstick Lodge and Cabins, Pittsburg, New Hampshire.

If you've ever felt the need to go to the Great North Woods for a spell, you couldn't do better for accommodations than Lopstick. Their cabins have a nice blend of the modern and the rustic and the area's scenery is beautiful. Lots to do if you're into hiking, kayaking and the ilk. Nothing to do if you're into just rusticating.

I'd bring an SUV rather than a Mini the next time I went, though.

TV series - Day Break

Largely ignored by the media after it's premiere in November, I was leery about this show both because of its premise - which is essentially that of Groundhog Day done as a murder mystery - and a trashing review in The Boston Globe. But I like episodic TV thanks to TiVo, and decided to get a season pass to give it a try.

And boy, am I glad I did. I'm hooked. I like Heroes, but I like Day Break better. I like it almost as much as 24, which is #1 on Fred's TV hit parade.

Time travel/time loop shows have to follow their own internal logic religiously, or the viewer's suspension of belief quickly breaks down. It's one of the reasons why Back to the Future and Groundhog Day and various Star Trek: TNG work as well as they do. Day Break follows its rules, and while doing so tells an addicting story. Good acting, good writing, tight plotting.

Now, at this point I should tell you to go and see it. But if you haven't you're probably going to be totally Lost (pun intended) at this point in the series. But I'm going to be disingenuous and tell you to watch it anyway, because ABC has announced it's being pulled from its time slot after December 27th, with no word about where the hell it's going, and by god, if they leave me hanging with five episodes to go, there is going to be such plotzing in the Halls of Merrimack like you've never seen. And by God, it'd better come out on DVD then and quickly!

pant. pant. Okay, end of list. Hope I gave you one or two pointers to things you haven't tried and might like. See You Real Soon.

See you in a bit

Holidays are always a good reason to take some time off, reflect on what you're doing - and why you're doing it - and break yourself out of the day-to-day rut.

If you celebrate Thanksgiving, then my wishes for a happy one for you and your family tomorrow. If you don't, then have a good day tomorrow... and the next day, too.

I'll be back soon.

And a note from your station manager...

Blogger is finally stumbling into Web 2.0, allowing some things (like labels, drag and drop rearranging of page elements, etc.) that other blog creation tools have been offering for years. I've been holding off, as I knew that "upgrading" would break my highly customized template. But, as it was breaking with today's posts for some reason anyway, I decided to bite the bullet.

fhb will slowly but surely return what we laughingly refer to as "normal," but I'd place more emphasis on the "slowly" part for the near future.

It's that time of year again

The grass is slowing, the day lightens later each morning, and fades earlier each evening.

Cool, late Summer days, and time for vacay. See you in a couple of weeks.

Bats in the House!

The wifey said to me, "Hon,
Bats in the house just ain't no fun.

It's swooping through the living room
get off your butt and get the broom.
I'll open the doors, you knock it out."

"Oh, no," I screamed, "The Bear got out."

"The Bub's in hiding, you stupid fool,"
the wifey cried, "Get that bat, while he's flying through."

I whacked the bat behind the TV
(it was playing something by Spike Lee),
but he recovered, and with an"Eeee"
took to the air and continued his route
while Dad-doo waved the broom about.

Tiring of the game the bat flew off,
Mystifying Dad-doo, while Momma did shout.

"FIND THE DAMN BAT! 'CAUSE I AINT GOING TO BED!
TILL I KNOW THAT CREATURE IS GONE OR IS DEAD!"

(She didn't mean it, she was under a strain. It's hard to be calm with bats on the brain.)

We searched in the basement, we searched through the rooms. Peggy with a paper bag. Fred with a broom.

No bat to be found on floor 1 or floor 2.

He was hiding behind a curtain in the master bedroom.

"Call the fire dept or the New Hamster PD," frightened Fred said like Allen Woody.

"I'll get him myself," said the brave Peggy.

But a man is a man, even when he's a wuss. So, girding his loins and grimming his puss, Fred donned heavy gloves and grabbed the ol' bat...

...who "eeeeee"'d quite fiercely and struggled so that...

...Fred dropped him,

and Peg gave him a whack

with the broom, while Fred also attacked.

The bat said, "Enuff! You two ain't good hosts. I'm going to bat heaven!"

And gave up the ghost.

The bat in the bag, the cats in the house. Order restored, as much as you'd think.

Peggy sat down and said, "I want a big drink."